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Tuesday 30 August 2016

Edinburgh Fringe, Live Stand-Up Comedy with teenagers

"My name is Stits, Gloria Stits. That sounds like a line from Oliver." This quote from an improvised spoof James Bond themed stage show was Probably one of the more memorable lines from our week at the Fringe. The best thing about shows like this being that they're rib-hurtingly funny for me and my teenage boys, without the more adult content of most stage comedy. The range of shows is stupendous, starting at all hours of the day and night, with dozens of categories by age suitability, genre, type of show, location, and times to select. A convenient App accompanies the phone book sized Fringe Guide to lead visitors to the optimum show for the moment.

Our kids are disappointingly sporty. Arts are really not their thing. None of them act or play musical instruments. So their enthusiasm for the worlds biggest arts festival was a little muted. Despite some enthusiasm from the boys for super-hero themed shows, and from our 8year old daughter for crafty stuff, the overall sense of anticipation was mainly around the possibility of Scotland playing a friendly at Murrayfield (I lied about that one).  But luckily with some bribery, and the choice of a show each, they were willing to give it a go.

The boys both went for super-hero things - one a comic lecture on comic-book heroes, and the other a hysterically funny debate between two stand-up comedians about whether Star Wars was better than Star Trek. Fantastic stuff - here was a whole pub basement full of nerds who knew more than they did about whose father killed whose brother in whichever episode. My highlight was my daughter's decision for her and me to run away to join a circus - in the form of a circle skills workshop. This started early one morning before the real shows started in the same big-top style circus  tent. This was part of a general children's area close to the University known as the Underbelly, with a large inflatable upside-down purple cow-shaped tent as its centrepiece. It's all a bit surreal.

Aside from the organised shows are street performers every few yards, mostly with superb crowd participation.  I was unlucky enough to play the role of "Englishman" In a slightly uncomfortable trick about our colonial heritage; the boys were an unexpected backdrop for a slightly odd dance think about climate change.

Any visit to Edinburgh leaves you coming away thinking that we really need to return to see the city itself away from the Fringe. There is plenty to see. When it rained we dipped into the National Museum of Scotland, and later on the fantastically scenic castle. When the sun came out we took in the incredible views from Arthur's Seat, passing the Scotttish Parliament on our return. We dined well, as well as soaking up the culture of a deep fried mars bar (popular with the teens) and Haggis (much better than I remembered it). We arrived for our train home in plenty of time to laze around Princes Gardens with our luggage and a picnic, rolling down the steep slopes under the splendid backdrop of the castle on its mount. 

This was a very short trip, only 5 days, but so much packed into it. We saw dozens of shows, mostly free entry where the audience pays what they think it's worth. By the time we flopped onto the train home we were exhausted. Trips, glorious trips.

Sunday 28 August 2016

Three generations boys adventure trip III: Northumberland & Cliff Diving


Somewhere between the Brexit Referendum and the election of Donald Trump, I took the boys to jump off a cliff. In the spirit of collective populism, we got 4 of our friends to plunge down into the sea below with us.  What a great summer! 

 

Like many British National Parks, the scenery of Northumberland is spectacularly beautiful. The slopes of the mountains, at times rolling, at other times harsh; the attractive stone-built towns, the wide sandy beaches, and of course the jagged cliffs plunging dramatically from the mountains to the sea.  But unlike many British National Parks, hardly anyone goes there. We enjoyed vast swathes of mountains and beaches to ourselves. And even more handily, there is a direct train to Alnmouth from London, by far the easiest way to travel with 4 boys and 3 drinking adults. 

 

As with Boys Adventure Trip II, we had booked activities with professional guides for most of the weekend. That left a reasonably amount of time amusing ourselves in the mountains and on the beach. Whilst Northumberland has nothing like the number of mountains that the Lake District has, there are a couple of chunky ones in the Cheviots, including the Cheviot itself. Due to time constraints, we climbed its neighbour, the prettily named Hedgehope Hill, close to the Scottish Border. This made it sound like a molehill, but in fact soars to 714 metres - just into mountain territory. The climb is a variety of grass paths, trudging though streams, and the obligatory battling through heather and scrambling over rocks to the top. It was a stunningly bright clear day, as it often is on the East Coast. We were rewarded with spectacular views to the Scottish Highlands one way, and over the rolling hills of Northumberland to the sea in the other direction. After that, we spent the rest of the day having simple fun on the beach. We improvised a version of rounders, there being enough space to really hit and run quite a distance. As the adults became exhausted, the boys buried one another up to the neck in sand. Frankly, there is nothing like a sandy beach in sunshine to amuse children of any age.

 



We stayed in the Sun Inn in Alnmouth, taking over 3 of their 4 bedrooms. This was a marvellous choice. The en-suite rooms were large and clean, the service was friendly, and the food was fantastic. Every morning several pigs were sacrificed for a wholesome breakfast to start the day. Our evening meals varied between the Sun Inn and an Italian across the road within the Hope & Anchor, both of which were excellent. One evening we ventured into Alnwick, shimmying up another hill first for some more incredible views up and down the coast, before descending back down into the town for a look at the castle and welcome selection of Indian food.

 

The next morning was a wet one, but it didn't matter too much as we were canoeing along the River Coquet. We had arranged a trip with Adventure Northumberland, who provided us (and another family) with 2 instructors, canoes and wetsuits. We met in the attractive town of Warkworth, close to its castle made famous by being used as the Quiddich pitch in Harry Potter films. After a brief introduction, we were tasked with paddling up over the weir (very hard) and sliding down it again (much easier) before paddling along the scenic river towards the sea. The reaction of our cityish boys was a real surprise. As with our previous canoeing trips, it’s a sport that we can all be equally good or bad at. The changing scenery around each corner and the wild birds flying past and wading in the shallows were all quite fascinating to them. However, just before boredom replaced curiosity, the waterfight began. This is where the instructors really helped, demonstrating a remarkable launch and bat technique with the paddles that thoroughly soaks your opponent!

 

However the next day we found that there is soaking, and absolute drenching. We met our Adventure Northumberland friends again for a session of “coasteering”, which simply involves making your way along the coast. However the coastal cliffs on this part are rather more dramatic than the beach. The waves really do smash over the rocks, repeatedly washing us into the sea where it's force was concentrated between the rocks. We’d scramble along cliff ledges, before leaping into the water where the ledge expired. Numerous times we paused to sit on what appeared to be a safe rock in the sea, only to get shoved back into the water by another enormous wave! Then bizarrely, we'd crawl through a tunnel in the cliff and find ourselves in a completed secluded lagoon in utter peace. 

 

Whilst each battle against the waves was adrenalin-lifting in itself, it was the cliff-jumping that was truly terrifying. We began slowly – initially just off a small rock, and gradually jumped off higher ledges as our confidence grew. By the end of the day, the more foolish amongst us were jumping off cliffs taller than a townhouse into jellyfish infested waves below. This took a certain amount of bravado, and I am proud to say that this was the one event where adults did better than the boys. Although as they pointed out – we have less to live for.  A welcoming optimistic view of life from the youth of today!

 

 

Tuesday 9 August 2016

Back to Borneo, Teens and Tweens

When our boys were 2 and 3 years old, we took them to Borneo. I didn't really know much about the place before that, it just sounded a bit crazy and wild. Mainly though, It sounded altogether different from the Centre Parks type holidays that everyone seemed to recommend to us but sounded grim. Logistically it was tricky, we took lots of canned food and first aid stuff together with the bulk of nappies and buggies that all trips with small children require, but the wildlife, the scenery, the adventures - everything screamed at us that we really should return. And so, with the boys now 12 and 14, accompanied by our 9 year old daughter -  we returned.


Borneo is huge in every way. Divided between Malaysia in the North and Indonesia in the South, collectively it is the Worlds third largest island. Almost all the land is concealed beneath vast dense rainforest, cross-crossed by wide rivers and narrow creaks. So much of the wildlife is unique to Borneo, most famously the Orang-Uran, but are also joined by Pygmy Elephants, crocodiles, Hornbills, dozens of types of bats and snakes in this hugely expansive menagerie. The choice of riverside rainforest lodges, traditional local longhouses, river wildlife spotting cruises and overland treks is bewildering. 



The temptation to cram too much into a holiday can be overwhelming. One of most important lessons learnt for a good family holiday is minimising the amount of actual travelling. We had scheduled 10 days in Borneo as part of a 6 week holiday, and as this was supposed to be the rest and relaxation bit - we picked an island resort for our entire stay. This had the downside of eliminating the "big" wildlife, particularly the Orang-Utans, but kept the best of the rest. 



Located a convenient 15 minute boat-ride from Kota-Kinabalu, itself the location of Malaysian Borneo's main international airport, Gaya Island is a stunning island paradise. Surrounded by white sandy beaches and so densely packed with rainforest that passage by vehicle is impossible, it formed a kind of beautiful Greater Borneo in miniature. We stayed in the aptly named Gaya Island Resort, one of a small number of eco-resorts on the island which clung to the hillside by the sea. Despite the buildings all being concealed in the rainforest, they gave up enchanting views across the clear blue sea to Mount Kinabalu in the clouds. 



The resort itself takes its eco-responsibilities seriously, minimising motorised transport around the resort and employing a team of expert naturalists and natural wonders to see. The highlight of this is a small aquarium beside the resort's private beach. This is home to an impressive collection of coral and local tropical fish, but the added benefit of an expert guide with the time to take us all individually through the best bits, in a manner bizarrely presentable to all our ages and levels of knowledge. The aquarium fulfills another critical function of nursing injured turtles back to health before releasing them back into the sea, local fishermen know that this is the place to bring them and several pass through their tanks each season.




The journey to the private beach can be a mini-adventure in itself. For an easy time, the resort offers a speedboat shuttle from the main hotel pier to the beach. However you can also join one of the resort's naturalists for a trek through the rainforest, taking in the fascinating plants and terrifying snakes along the way (we only saw 3 types on our walk, of which only one was deadly, but cobras have been spotted before). The funniest animals were the bearded pigs which exist in quite large numbers around the beach and resort, standing around with their ugly hangdog expressions in this corner of paradise.  They were joined by dozens of extremely mischievous long-tailed macaques taking delight in flinging nuts at the tourists below, definitely the favourite for the children.



We spent one day in Kota Kinabalu, partly for a day out but mainly as a break from the exorbitant costs of dining in the resort. Popularly known as KK, this has been the major administrative centre and gateway to the region since colonial times. Whilst a large part of the town feels like a polluted chaotic dual carriageway, its original backpacker corners and traditional markets still exist and are well worth a visit. It can be challenging (and risky) to encourage children to try local food, which makes it all the more satisfying when you end up having a splendid meal in a local shopping centre for under £1 a head (albeit that we had meet or payment of a McFlurry bribe for pudding).



To me now, I think Borneo has the best of everything for a children's holiday regardless of whether they are 2, or 14, or somewhere in the middle. It's exotic and different, and feels that way with the tropical heat, the incredibly accessible wildlife, and the stunning white beaches and clear blue coral-filled sea. But it's also safe, English is widely spoken, things work. You could spent months exploring the innards of the island, or a week enjoying the surface of it as we did. I'd love to go back, but think next time we will be older and perhaps our children will start their story - "when our parents were 75 and 80 we took them to Borneo".

Sunday 7 August 2016

Kowloon: Bright Lights and Chaos


Kowloon. It's a name that conjures up choking tropical heat, dense neon lights, chaotic crowds  of people, exotic street food, pick-pockets, purveyors of fake watches and tailor-made suits. And it's all those. The assault of sights, sounds and smells on the Kowloon pavements is something that still excites me after visiting dozens of times, usually with the excitement of children emphasising the buzz.



Like most global cities, Kowloon hosts a set of museums to occupy the curious minds of children. Unlike the museums of most global cities, the Hong Kong science museum is so hands on throughout that its hard to leave. From a set of tricky logical puzzles and a mirror maze in the basement, through exhibitions on architecture, environment, sound, and on up to the transport section at the top with working engines to fire up, and Cathay Pacific's first plane hanging from the roof. Running top to bottom in the central atrium is a spectacular ball run which releases a set of balls every hour through a three-dimensional maze of pivoting beams, spirals and drops. If we are struggling to work out why Chinese children are so much better at maths and science than western ones, this isn't a bad place to start.

On the same site is the Hong Kong museum of History. Less hands on, but a well presented and interesting story nonetheless, it takes visitors from the early tribes settling on the flatter land, through colonial oppression and war, and economic development. It concludes with a slightly terrifying waxwork of Mrs Thatcher handing over the territory to Deng Xiao-Ping, followed by an optimistic view of the future of Hong Kong within a greater China.

Stretching North from the Museums are the craziest sets of markets, which amuse kids and parents alike; both beautiful but sickening at the same time. The bird market in particular has stunning brightly coloured creatures crammed into tiny cages with an impossible number of other birds. Onto the pet fish and reptile markets, where our children reliably plead with us to buy them some form of oversized lizards. Then around the corner to the flower market, where the splendour of the tropical flowers that bloom naturally in the heat of South East Asia make Columbia Road look quite drab. Finishing up in the dense crowds of Mong Kok, the most densely populated region in the world, but known to regular visitors as the ideal place to buy the latest electronics, generally cheaper than at home. Suddenly the familiar pressure to buy ipads for the whole family appears, so perhaps this bit is best avoided.

Around the Southern tip of Kowloon is the Tsim Sha Tsui, more popularly known simply as TST. Here are the bright neon lights in Chinese and English that are instantly familiar from films and pictures of the City. Its worth a stroll through Kowloon Park, a strange oasis of peace and tropical birds built on the sight of the previously crime-infested but self-governing Kowloon Walled City. The shock of then being plunged into the hectic noisy chaos of Nathan Road is all the more intense from here. Personally I prefer to navigate around rather than through the dozens of shopping centres clustered in this area, however the sheer scale of the Harbour City shops could make it a day out in itself. Aside from the welcoming Air Conditioning, the basement dedicated to childrens clothes and toys – covering the scale from Dior Kids to Toys R Us, will please some in the party. The top floor dedicated to electronics stores will please others. However you might struggle to squeeze a 60 inch TV into your suitcase if that appeals.

The final piece is a stroll along the waterfront itself, along the Avenue of the Stars, where you can pose alongside statues of Cantonese and International film stars. You may of course need to queue to model your Kung-Fu pose next to Bruce Lee, or simply photograph everyone else doing that for you. The walk takes you past plenty of other air-conditioned diversions; yet another amazing shopping centre in the Former Marine Police Headquarters Compound complete with unusually sympathetically restored colonial buildings, the Space Museum, and the Peninsular Hotel with its fleet of green Rolls Royce Phantoms and surprisingly accessible baby-changing facilities. All of this whilst presenting a spectacular view across the harbour to Hong Kong Island itself, only £2 away for a family of four by Star Ferry.

Hong Kong is an amazing destination. But to me, the buzzing life and chaotic activity of Kowloon is the most exciting part of it.

 

Saturday 6 August 2016

The New Territories of Hong Kong


Our view of Hong Kong is oddly skewed from most visitors by the way that most of our visits involve staying with family deep in the New Territories, close to the Chinese border and well away from the tourist spots of Kowloon and Hong Kong Island. It remains incredible to me that many people visiting Hong Kong, and even many ex-pats living there, are completely unaware of the chaotic cities and rural wilderness a few minutes away. The city of Yuen Long for instance is utterly bewildering to westerners. White faces are rare, the few we see are confused foreign spouses like me, their Eurasian children galloping into the vast throngs of people with their local cousins - enthralling for them but terrifying for me.
Despite our lack of a common language, I am aware from certain facial expressions that my mother-in-law has concerns over the freshness of the fish on British markets. The fish market in Yuen Long provides an explanation for this - the fish are still alive. She nudges the boys urgently to draw their attention to a bowl of very agitated prawns randomly jumping out of the bowl and regularly landing in the bag of the old man standing by it chatting away completely oblivious. My daughter meanwhile gazes curiously at a densely populated tank of eels, struggling to connect which head follows which slithery body through the throng of other eels to which tail.


A bus ride out of Yuen Long, and the unfolding countryside varies immensely. In parts there are poorly maintained concrete roads with scrapyards dotted across former swampy farmland. Elsewhere there are new developments of 2 and 3 storey houses with pillars either side of the door and gleaming Mercedes' under tarpaulin sunshades outside. Into this mix, the ancient walled village of Kam Tin was once one of the larger settlements when the area was covered in farmland, and has parallels with remote Italian villages with its quiet narrow shady streets, children playing and old ladies sitting outside. This is also a good place to head for traditional Cantonese eating, particularly dim sum. The extraordinary range of tastes and textures of the food is matched by the deafening racket of the dozens of people chatting loudly to each other and their phones, half a dozen TVs playing different shows, the clattering of chopsticks and the staff yelling instructions to one another. But don't ask what exactly it is on the plate. Sometimes it's biologically obvious, sometimes ignorance is comforting.

Bus route 51 over the top of Hong Kong's highest mountain, Ta Mo Shan, is one not to be missed. Round each hairpin bend the views extend further, before disappearing completely as the road climbs through dense forest. A military airport appears in a previously unseen valley, a vast People's Liberation Army camp occupies a distinctive former British military base on the slopes. On and on upwards and the views across the Chinese city of Shenzhen appear, seemingly expanding more with each trip up. As the road steepens, the pained labours of the bus become more apparent, with the occasional super toned cyclist struggling past us. And then we're at the top, and begin the terrifying descent into Tsuen Wan, where the children again vanish with cousins into some vast neon-lit arcade to execute some more zombies.

A more peaceful time can be enjoyed around the Plovers Cove reservoir, a short bus ride from Sha Tin. Numerous bike hire venues surround the estuary and the reservoir itself, with off-road cycle routes populated by all kinds of pedal powered vehicles, both fun and more serious. The boys select a nice dual pedalled model with a comfy armchair type attachment for Grandma, I am quite surprised by their generosity. As we pedal out across the dam the views of the mountains open up again, the steep green mountains like a tropical version of the Scottish Highlands. In the distance we see an enormous statue of Buddha's mother, which apparently marks the site of a nunnery funded by Li Ka Shing, Hong Kong's richest man. When the apocalypse arrives - he will be protected in his secret bunker there.

Hong Kong is marvellously exciting wherever you go. There is so much to see and experience that its hard to narrow it down to a shortlist. However, I think a few days in the New Territories as part of your trip will show you what makes Hong Kong Different.

Friday 5 August 2016

Hong Kong, extreme energy, extreme towers, extreme shopping


The spectacular island of Hong Kong is perhaps the most energetic place in the world where it seems no-one needs to sleep. Whatever it chooses to do, it takes to a mad excess, particularly when it comes to extreme shopping and extreme construction. The resulting skyline of 40 to 110 floor tightly clustered skyscrapers crawling up the steep mountainside from the harbour creates views that are imitated but never remotely equalled. Whilst the views of the Island from the opposite shore in Kowloon are impressive, there is plenty of fun to be had taking children up some of the towers to look out from amongst the throng of buildings.

Some of the more popular but quite different viewing sites close to the Star Ferry are Observation Wheel (a little like the London Eye), and the Bank of China Building Observation Deck. However my personal recommendation is the Hong Kong Monetary Authority Information Centre way up on the 55th floor of the International Financial Centre, or IFC 2. Not only are the contents exciting for an economist like myself, but the general entrance is great with kids, passing through a smart lift lobby, getting photo ID, and into the gleaming office lifts. Your children may recognise the building as being the one that Batman leapt from in “The Dark Knight”, but even if they miss this subtle reference, emerging from the lift is like stepping into the cloud layer. The height is breathtaking, but the humidity and apparent smog are also evident. The combination of IFC and IFC2 offer both extreme construction and extreme shopping. Fortunately there is a satisfactory set of food options across the two centres, including a McDonalds. As much as travelling with children opens their minds to different styles of cooking (see the blog on the New Territories), McDonalds does cheer everyone up.

A different kind of view emerges by taking the Peak Tram from Central, through the mid-levels, to Victoria Peak. Although a rather crowded tourist hot-spot, it’s a cheap and effective way to get a good idea of the overall layout of the Central Hong Kong, The extremes of construction are much clearer here, where the mountainside appears to be too steep to build on, yet 40, 50, 60 storey apartment blocks are impaled into the slopes. Eventually the tram rises above the building line to give another magnificent harbour view. Whilst most of the Victoria Peak Terminus building is rather touristy and tacky, the views from the rooftop are worth paying the premium on the tram fare to see.

On another Tram, horizontal this time, the Hong Kong Tramways has been running the same route along the waterfront for over a century.  It’s one of the very few areas where the business-like intensity of Hong Kong has been sentimental enough to allow some kind of nod to its heritage. The mechanics and controls of the tram are as cutting edge as one would expect from Hong Kong’s impeccably reliable public transport system, but the outside appearance is little changed since double deckers were introduced in 1912. Get off at Admiralty for some more luxury shopping – a particularly useful spot for buying a handbag that you will no longer have any money to carry in it.

 The best thing for me about Admiralty is the bus station underneath it, taking you well away from any of the shops. The 629 bus to Ocean Park is the one trip that should be mandatory for a family holiday to Hong Kong. A phenomenal theme park alternative to the Disneyland on Lantau, Ocean Park combines wildlife and heritage with rides for all ages and of course more views. This is the only place in Hong Kong where you can see Pandas, cared for in a large enclosure which is surprisingly uncrowded and educational. There is also a substantial aquarium boasting performing dolphins, again with an emphasis on education and ecology. Passing through the steeper parts of the site is made easier by a vast outdoor escalator – in this case only the second longest in the world. The rides are suitable for a good range of ages and fear levels, and feature plenty of cooling water splashes. A cablecar links the 2 sites on either side of the mountain, which itself presents more views of the bays of Southern Hong Kong, and the queues of container ships carrying China’s produce to the world.

Across this side of the island are the pleasant areas of Aberdeen, Repulse Bay and Stanley. Hong Kong lacks anywhere that could be remotely be described as “undiscovered”, but the tall blocks of flats surrounding these attractive bays look less out of place than they would in more rural island locations. The beaches are pleasant and extremely safe – even young children wander the towns and take taxis independent of parental supervision. The market in Stanley is pleasant for a wander and to pick up souvenirs, and the shopping generally is much less intensely glitzy than most of Hong Kong.

Although not on Hong Kong island itself,  no trilogy of a Hong Kong family tour would be complete without mention of the Big Buddha on Lantau. Built in the closing years of British Rule, with a distinct look towards the future (the Buddha faces towards Peking), this largest seated Buddha in the World is an engineering marvel even more incredible than the skyscrapers seen earlier. An exhibition inside the statue tells something of its construction, but the overall effect is incredible. Despite the usual parade of tourist memorabilia stalls here, the monastery to which the Buddha is attached still offers a wholesome vegetarian meal to travellers. Parts of the monastery are open to quiet visitors, and this is a good place to learn something about the Buddhist culture. Our pictures here are of the same boy in the same place with 13 years between the picture on his first, and most recent visit; just to show its worth coming back to. Not only does the climb up the steps to the Buddha offer amazing views over the mountains and sea, but the journey by cable-car, some with glass floors for added fear, give spectacular views of the airport, the countryside, the emerging Bridge to Macau, and eventually to the majestic Buddha statue itself.

Hong Kong island is glitzy and glamorous, which can mean expensive. But the most incredible experiences of this incredible island are the views, and they cost nothing. Don’t forget the rest of Hong Kong; Kowloon and the New Territories should be explored, but it’s the vertical sights of the island and the views from and over them that amaze children the most.